Generosity is wonderful and to give feels great but when it impedes the ability to take or receive or even desire - we’ve got an issue. Or we are about to have one...
Some give because they feel they need to do it to justify their existence. Some got the message or modeling somewhere along the line that abandoning themselves is the ultimate sign of love, care and yes that it is some sort of ‘virtue’. Some have identified as ‘people pleasers’ and forgotten their role and basic rights as a person themselves.
Those people usually end up reaching out with questions about desire, confusion about how to place themselves in their life or how to connect to pleasure. They are usually at the point where they are waking up to this realization and how it is impacting their relationships, work and sex lives.
So what is being disguised when one hides behind this compulsive feeling generosity? Connecting to the value of one’s own desires, interrogating the longing that lies in all of us because we are human, the fear of surrendering to what we truly want, or the fear of our desire to dominate, or our deep yearning to be cared for too.
Bringing your desires forward and saying “yes” to the things you want might feel scary at first if you aren’t used to it. Don’t stop giving altogether just remember to save some and take some for yourself.
